I totally understand being on the outside looking in. To a certain extent, I am still in that position: Last weekend, while running around the Seward Park loop, I had to actively stifle the urge to throttle a darling blonde stick, dressed all in white, walking her two adorable beagles. So I get it: we're all human, and we all feel jealousy, whether we acknowledge it or not.
But expressing it is another issue altogether. I realize that my friends aren't psychic; when they make a backhanded (albeit joking) compliment to me, they have no way of knowing that they're the tenth person to do so that week and that the "flattery" (or lack thereof) is therefore wearing a little thin. Nonetheless, here are some comments I have recieved lately that have seriously taxed my acting skills:
"I would show your blog to my friend Jane, but it would just piss her off. She'll be like, 'How come it's so easy for her to get skinny?'"
"I hate you. I'm totally gonna have a baby just so I can breastfeed and burn as many calories as you do."
"What's WITH you lately? The pounds are just FALLING off you! Must be nice to lose weight so easily!"
It has gotten to the point where I have learned that there are certain people I can't talk about this with. Which is one of the reasons I have a blog. Because I can't say them out loud, I feel compelled to use this space to make the following points:
- While the breastfeeding (which I stopped two months ago) helped the weight-loss immensely, the first fifteen pounds I lost were pregnancy pounds anyway. I had to take two steps back to get one step ahead.
- I started trying to lose weight while I was breastfeeding BECAUSE of the automatic calorie burn. It was something I knew I wanted to do anyway; why not start at the most advantageous time?
- I am working my ASS off. If I was sitting around in a feather-trimmed bed jacket eating bon-bons while the pounds simply melted away, then yes, hating me would be logical. But I'm running 20 miles a week, lifting tons of iron, and depriving myself of foods I really, really miss.
- When YOU start running 20 miles a week, lifting tons of iron, and depriving yourself of foods you really, really miss, THEN you can talk about how fun and easy and great it is to be in my shoes. Until then, shut your broccoli hole and stop resenting me for looking awesome in the size 8s I have worked so hard to zip myself into.